High Desert Jezebel

The quick update: Vick almost died in April 2016 but he didn't. We got married June 2016. We moved to Ohio in November 2016 but Vick hated it so we came back the next summer. While in Ohio I started doing food delivery apps and I think I'm done with traditional jobs forever. Vick's drinking got really bad and we almost divorced; he quit, though, so we worked it out. We tried to restart Raptor House but it wasn't fun anymore so Vick shut it down.

You know what's awesome? Having amazing bands travel thousands of miles across the country to play at your house. The Cryptics and the Crystal Methodists were a great show, professional and nice; I wish I'd had the chance to talk to them more but unfortunately I had to deal with a boyfriend who instead of taking care of the house got shitfaced before the show even started and kept yelling and flashing his dick in the front yard. Not fun. I did get records from both bands; I'm starting up a collection from everyone who plays at the house (right now it's just those two, Bad Future, and Catholic Guilt). The landlady got wind of the parties, though, so were going to have to tone it down. Rob, the new roommate, has been great, making sure Vick doesn't die in his drunken stupor and keeping an eye out so that the house doesn't get destroyed. I like having a punk house, don't get me wrong, but I think my idea of a punk house is a lot more creativity and community t...

Vick and I went to Old Town today to test our cameras while we walked around a neighborhood that isn't the student ghetto. It's funny, I've lived in Albuquerque off and on for seven years and I've only been to Old Town maybe twice, once to see Fast Heart Mart play at the gazebo and once when my mom came to town for Johnny's and my wedding (in 2011; the last of the Navajo wind talkers, about five men, were signing books. The last one passed away last year). There wasn't anything special going on but it was a lot of fun to just wander around and film each other. Have you seen Rome '78? I was thinking it would be cool to do a Western that way here in New Mexico. After I got home I downloaded the free version of Lightworks; I spent probably six hours messing around with it tonight. I don't understand (so far, at least) why it's supposed to have such a steep learning curve. The tutorials were pretty straight forward, anyway. Unfortunately, my camera sav...

Wow, a lot of things have been going on since I last posted. Raptor House is in it's fifth month since Vick and I took it over and things are going amazingly well. It's always amazing to have to local bands like Bad Rye or Soviet Science Fair play, and new projects like Worship No Apparatus forming in our living room. Getting Catholic Guilt and Bad Future was exciting (I don't think I've ever seen this place so packed!). This Friday is Daniel's noise/fetish birthday party and Saturday we're doing a movie night (Holy Mountain/Gutterpunk Massacre), so it can only get better, right? It's great to see kids like Yuckii coming up in the world and supporting our venue so strongly. I finished the semester at UNM by the skin of my teeth and I'm taking the summer off, possibly longer, to focus  on the house, making movies, writing stories, publishing zines, making art, and traveling. If all goes well Vick and I will be finishing up his latest script and m...

Whoa, it's been awhile. The ups and downs! The back story: The taco shop closed down on me and I took a desperate hitch-hiking trip to California, where I met the most wonderful people, punk rockers who like motorcycles and bones and don't just listen to metal. When I got back Johnny broke up with me for a day, but Christian mediated and we worked it out. We were so dead broke and beat, I think that was the problem; I don't think people who have never been that poor can understand how much money means to every part of your life when you don't have it. I got a job at a call center after a long wait; it started out full of promise and quickly deteriorated. Everyone was nice but the job itself caused me such stress that I started crying in front of my bosses one day. That was about a month ago; I took a few days off, then put my notice in when I came back. There is no point in working a job that makes you that miserable. More people have died: Torch, Ian, I don't k...

I didn't know when I last posted that my dad had only twelve days left to live. He died October 5th, during my birthday party. I didn't find out until the next day, two days before my actual birthday, already a bad day because Johnny and I had a bad time the night before. I called my mom and had her tell my sister so that my uncle wouldn't have to. They cremated him a few days later. I didn't come home for that. My uncle and my brother sent me money so we could fly up just before Halloween so we could come to the memorial. We made jokes about him and dumped some of his ashes into the creek at Ed's house. I felt bad for my aunt and uncles. I cry a lot lately when no one's around. It's not all for my dad; this year has been a bad one for a lot of reasons and I think it finally got me. Bike trouble, disheartening job hunts, no car, no cash, a lot of people dying. I feel like I'm so far down I can't get up anymore. I've lost hope. I'm tryin...